Winter Odyessy to the Twilight Zone

Mid Feburary, mid-morning:

Mid winter break ski trip has come. Hubby always makes the arrangements and deals with the hotel but he's staying behind this time. So I check into this hotel in northern Japan only to be given a labyrinth of paperwork and directions. After signing 3 documents that I couldn't even read, I'm given 3 different types of documents just to prove I am staying in this hotel. I have to go to one place to pick up my suitcase, I need to go to another place to store my suitcase until the room is ready, and I need to go to place 3 to change clothes, and place 4 to change shoes. And there is place 5 where I can store my skis that I rent overnight, but it turns out they won't rent it overnight to me. This is way too difficult. I already miss my husband. 

Same day, an hour later:

 I put my small bags in a locker but the big bag does not fit. They've given me free coins for the locker but since I took things in and out every time after I locked, I ran out of coins. I go to the front desk and ask them to take the big bag because it said they would on the wall somewhere. Instead they show me a huge locker in an obscure area that can take any suitcase. It needs 2 coins because it's so large. I don't have any left. They lead me to a coin vending machine.
Staff:"1 coin is 100yen"
Me:"wait, I have to pay? It said you will take it so I used up the coins"
staff: I gave you 3 coins. How can you use it up?"
Me:"Because the sign said you will take the big suitcase!"
staff:"we take big bags that do not fit big locker. You should checked big locker"
Me: "How would I even know it existed if the big lockers were behind the men's dressing room!! GIVE ME COINS"

Same day, another hour later:

I rent skis for the day. The store renting out skis is part of the hotel. I have already paid the hotel in full. But "no. No charge rental fee to room on first day. Only second day and after".
Me: "That does not make sense. I've paid your hotel in advance. Like I am going to run away with your skis today? It's no different than the second day. Charge it please"
Store: "rule, policy. need to follow rule"
Me: "you did it last year"
Store: after a long pause "only this time!"
Me: "Okay, so I like to rent it for 3 days"
Store: "no, you can only rent 1 day at a time"
I am ready to scream.

Same day, 30 minutes later:

At lunch the hotel restaurant does not let me charge it to my room. What is wrong with this hotel? Is it me? Is there some sort of miscommunication here?
I glare at the cashier and ask her what hotel does not allow a guest to charge their meals to their room. Where does it say cash only? Nobody informed me! Charge it!!!
The cashier, wanting to avoid confrontation and scared at my freak out, promptly brings out a form, fills it out and asks me to write my room # and sign it. THEY CAN DO IT!

Same day, 40 minutes later:

The ski school won't let me charge the fees to my room on the first day either. This place is a cash guzzling machine. I show them my wallet, empty, and tell them with a smile "no cash. you already took it all" and show them my check-in documents. For some reason these people do not like direct eye contact so I go nuts looking into their eyes. They relent. I am becoming the queen of passive aggressiveness.

Same day, 30 minutes later:

I try to reserve a table for dinner. The front desk directs me to a "restaurant concierge" behind me.
Me: "I'd like to make a reservation for 5 at the French restaurant at 6"
Concierge: "yes, certainly".
He picks up the phone, dials the restaurant and HANDS ME THE RECEIVER.
Concierge: "please tell them your name, number of people and time and discuss whatever necessary with them"

Same day, a few minutes later:

Reservations made without any help from the "concierge", the restaurant calls back when I am in my room.
Rest: "I understand you have a meal voucher, and you are having dinner with the M family?"
Me: "yes, that's right"
Rest: "the M family does not have meal vouchers. Please ask them to look at menu and choose what they like for dinner. Please list it up and can you call us back immediately?"
I don't remember being employed by the restaurant. I tell them to call the M family themselves and hang up.
I am having a really bad day.

Same day, finally out on the slopes:

There were high school kids lining up on a 2seater chairlift. There were more than 100 kids and the lift operator was letting the kids sit one per chairlift. With the kids and other skiers, the line was getting longer by the minute. I shouted "2 kids per lift! Look at the line!" The operator just shrugged. When I skied back, the line was still there. Painfully slow. Something had to be done. I waved my fingers frantically screaming "2 kids on the lift!" It didn't work and I got on the lift defeated. But the kid who sat in front of me turned around and gave me a peace sign. 

Same day, apres-ski:

The other family and I decide to let the kids try out snow mobiles. This event is part of the hotel too. Yet we can't make reservations at the front desk. They make us schlep across the hotel, all the way to the other side of the driveway. Once we are there, we are informed we can't make reservations.
"come when you want to ride"
So we have to schlep to and fro all over again. And of course, you can NOT charge this to the room.

Same day, apres-apres-ski:

The hotel wants us to take our room bath towels to the pool. Then there will be none left for our shower so I ask them to bring 2 extra bath towels.
"That would be 200yen" the housekeeper informs me.
What? Since when do we pay extra for towels at hotels? I feel like I am in the twilight zone. And with nothing to lose, I go postal. The towels magically appeared with fees promptly waived.

Same day, after pool:

After I switch on the A/C in my room, a bug the size of a bee flies out. It's flying high near the light and I can't reach it. I call the front desk for help. It takes them 10 minutes, and by the time help arrives (with 2 towels and a spray!), I manage to swat down the bug and capture it. The hotel guy comes in my room to inspect and sprays something around. I don't like the artificial floral smell at all.
Me:"does that kill bugs or prevent them?"
hotel guy: "no, this is a deodorant"
Me:"what? why? Is it a stink bug or something?"
hotel guy: "no, no. we just think it's important"
?????????

Same day, dinner time:

The French restaurant serves us steak without asking us how we want it done. It comes literally bloody rare. One of us tells a waiter that we have not been asked and that the meat was way undercooked. The waiter says yes and disappears into the kitchen only to emerge a few seconds later, standing there nonchalantly. Nothing happens for a good 10 minutes. We are assuming we will get a new plate of beef but it's taking real long. My son wants beef so I summon another waiter and tell him what we have are way too rare. He takes the steak and brings them back well done.

Same day, after kids are asleep:

I am tired and desperately need a nice cup of coffee. So I ask the front desk. The woman points to a machine and in clear English says "free coffee service machine". I am psyched. Finally something that is not a pilfering scheme. Complimentary coffee. Now we are talking service. I go up and press a button for cappuccino. Nothing happens. I press another, this time for espresso. Nothing happens. I stand there frantically pushing any button, wondering what is wrong. A different hotel staff passes by and points to the coin slot.
Me: "how much?"
staff: "200yen"
huh, free my a**.
Me: "the woman at the front desk said it was free"
staff: "yes free to choose any drink"
He said this with a straight face.

Same day, reminiscence time:

The kids were psyched to be together so they ran around the hotel all the time. For once I let them go wild and hardly stopped them, secretly hoping the hotel would just kick us out and end my misery. Turns out Japanese parenting cherishes unruly children and there are tons of wild kids in this hotel Our kids were nothing out of the ordinary.
I used to work in non-Japanese hotel development so maybe that's why this hotel is getting on my nerves. Everything they do defies what I consider basic hotel services. They also make us fill form after form. I don't do forms, period. I now have renewed respect for my husband who puts up and deals with this cr*p.

Sea Turtles

Alex is interested in the oil spill in the Gulf coast.
He wants to know who did it and who the bad guy is.
He wants the bad guy dead.
Well if BP dies, it will cause major financial crisis in the UK which will eventually affect the US economy, but that is too complicated to explain to him.
So I agree that the bad guy should die.

Once we are happy about bad guys dying, we turn our attention to the victims.
He is worried about the Sea Turtles.
He is worried about good Sea Turtles dying.
I have not asked him about the bad Sea Turtles. That would be too complicated.
He wants to help the good Sea Turtles..
So we talked about donating our time or resources for the cause.
He is in Japan, attending school & camp so cannot physically go there to help.
I don't think they would find a 6yo much useful anyway but I keep that to myself.
He wants to send lots of Dawn washing liquid but I am sure Dawn takes care of that.
So we are left with sending money.

I explain to him how I send money to charitable organizations.
He becomes interested in my organizations but then realizes that none support wildlife.
He gives me grief for the entire time we are eating dinner why I do not help wildlife.
I agree to match his donation just so he shuts up.
I am totally losing this game.
I think he is going to grow up to be a great fundraiser.

So we find ways to raise money.
Selling cookies door to door does not seem to work.
The neighbors are not really a friendly bunch and some have told me straight out that they do not like children.
This coming from a country of people who are discreet and reserved.
These people have dogs instead, which is prohibited in this apartment building.
This coming from a country of people known to be honest.
Hmmmm.

So we look at his room and ponder how much space is left for him to fly his "Lego Republic Attack Cruiser built in 2 days without help" (that is the official name).
So much toys. And even more in storage.
We open his closet and 4 sweaters fall out.
So much clothes. And even more in storage.
We look at his bookshelf with overflowing books.
It's a lego / book sandwich everywhere. And more in storage.
We drag out the under-bed storage and find DVDs we have never watched, and will never watch in the future, with long-lost Lego pieces stuck among them. Do we have more in storage?

Time for belated spring cleaning.
Ken wants to get rid of the storage room too.
It's costing him a fortune now that I switched jobs to a lesser paying but nobler one.

We start with private placements.
Since Alex is comfortable with these people, he demands an outrageous price.
They fade away.
Shocked, he give some away free.
The he is shocked he is not making money.
He learns that doing business with friends is not easy.
A humbling experience at the ripe old age of 6.

Then we move onto Craigslist like sales.
Finally it's working.
He is aiming to raise US$ 200 for the Sea Turtles.
Since he is giving away 50% of his proceeds, that's going to take a heck of a long time.....

My Dinner - Yum!

My Lunch

Japanese lunch boxes by regular folks.

I have just compiled an album of my lunch box production just because I needed to kill time until they air the world cup soccer.

Ken has improved tremendously with his packing skills over just a few months. I am jealous.

Baking With Alex

"Mommy, is dinner ready yet?"

For someone who rushes home to release the babysitter of her duties and cooks dinner at the same time so we can start eating at 6:30 and Alex can fall asleep by 7:30, I don't need a reminder that I am falling behind schedule.

"Mommy, I am stahr-ving"

"mommmmmmmmm! foooooooooood!"

It's annoying as hell. I am doing my best.

"ew, you gave me tomato sauce. I hate tomato sauce. I'm not eating this"
That does it.

No dinner for you. Ever. 

Okay, that is not realistic.

I am explaining over and over that making meals take time.

"So then let's go to McDonalds"

No you need to eat real food.

"Then lets get delivery"

There is only so much sushi we can eat and I am not ordering Dominos.

It's not like this is NYC where you can order in any food you can imagine.

You can make your own damn dinner if you are so demanding.

And I had an epiphany.

That is it, have Alex cook something so he knows how difficult it is.

Breakfast is out of the question.

School bus picks Alex up at 7:20am which is a 10 to 15 minutes walk away from where we live. 

We only wake up at 6 so we don't have the luxury of enjoying Alex's sunny side up.

If Alex ruins dinner, that will ruin MY day, since dinner is the only time I get to eat something that resembles real food.

So have him make snack. If he burns it, it will still go in his backpack as his bus snack. He should be responsible for his own creation.

So we go through cookie recipes and he settles for "irresistible chocolate chip cookies".

We go buy the ingredients.

"Do I have to? Why don't you just go buy and I will stay home playing Legos"

Shopping is part of the cooking experience. No shopping, no bus snack.

He obliges.

We have trouble finding 12oz of chocolate chips. 

The modest Japanese do not dump in 12oz of chocolate chip for just 40 cookies.

Each bag of Chocolate chips is 1.7oz, or 50grams.

I need to get 7bags of these things?

They only had 4, so I buy all. We decide to settle for m&ms for the rest.

Ken made pasta for lunch so we used the still hot pasta pot and put a bowl over it to soften butter.

We dump in dark brown sugar to it, then scrape out vanilla beans from it's pod and dump it in too.

"ew, this is vanilla? it looks like dirt. why isn't it white?"

Why should it be white? This is the real deal. We use real ingredients for our real food.

"But vanilla ice cream is white"

Good, I am teaching him something. Vanilla is NOT white, the cream is!

So Alex starts mixing the sugar-butter mixture. 

I stress that the slower he works on his food, the yummier it gets.

He is careful not to spill anything and mixes really slowly and carefully.

I start mixing the flour, salt and baking soda and then allow Alex to break an egg to put into the sugar mixture.

He cracks, opens and drops half the shell.

I think Salmonella but then realize that we will be baking it anyway. Lets just cross our fingers.

I scoop out the shell and let him continue.

"Still mix slowly. Slow is king"

Amazingly, he is concentrating on what he is doing. He enjoys how the yolk breaks up and disappears.

We mix in the flour mix to the sugar mix and he keeps on whisking.

The mixture gets thicker but he is not backing out.

It's time for the chocolate to go in.

Alex is all starry-eyed with the prospect of a creation, or so I thought.

"Am I doing good?"

Yes, you are very careful, and have not rushed things. The dough looks awesome.

"Good, what is my prize"

Prize? What prize? We are baking here. It's not a contest. You will get to eat the cookie, that is the prize.

"Oh, I thought I'd get Optimus Prime or something"

Hope dashed, he is less enthusiastic about the last step.

We spoon the dough onto the baking sheet and start baking.

It only takes 12 minutes, and we can see the dough softening, melting down flat and then slightly rising.

Alex is fixated on the oven window, I am worried about the lifespan of the light bulb in the oven.

The timer goes off, it's ready.

"Mommy, this doesn't look like the picture on the recipe"

No, it doesn't. Sometimes these things turn out differently with a slight difference in ingredients or how you bake it.

"but I wanted the one on the picture"

He walks away, going back to his Lego.

Once the cookies are cooled down, I call him for a taste test.

Alex takes a bite.

"mommy, this isn't good, it's irresistible!!"

He realizes that the whole process took an hour.

"Yep, making cookies take time. Just like making dinner takes time"

"Yeah mommy, I know now. Now, I really know."

mission accomplished!!!

Alex is old enough to realize.....

Alex made a very interesting observation yesterday.

"Daddy is funny. He says important things to me but doesn't do them himself"

Ouch!!!

Daddy's gotta talk the talk and walk the walk!

Thank goodness I wasn't busted, yet.....